Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Everyday Better

Everyday
In every way
I'm getting better
And better
And better
But not according
To Joel Noftle.
He says I should
Keep quiet
About it
If I make
Any improvement.

Monday, August 12, 2013

Somerset's Hug

     Last night my youngest son Somerset (Nick) gave me what must have been the nicest hug he's ever given.  I think it was partly because I made a birthday cake for him on his birthday.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

The Little Girl With So Many One Penny Pieces, She Gave Up by Joanne Okano

     When I was young, my mother gave me an allowance.  Pocket money we call it in England, by the way.  Well my pocket money didn't stretch very far, but I decided to buy a book, a children's book, in paperback at the bookstore.  It was a first time book, it wasn't old, and it cost quite a bit of money, 20p to be exact.  (That's 20 pence.)  I had it all in pennies, I said, since my mother paid me my pocket money in pennies.  So I counted them all out on the desk.  Everyone was waiting, even my mother.  When she saw I only had 17 pence (pennies) she provided the remainder of the price.  Wasn't that kind?
The End

Saturday, August 3, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Conclusion)

     All adoring men put her aside though when they saw her lips move.
     "I like you," she said, and they ran.  They didn't want anything to do with her.
     "I love you," she said and they married someone else.
     Then he came along.  He too had been put down, and pushed around a lot so he knew how she felt. He didn't want her at first, he thought she was too ugly, but no, he thought she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.  Except for her flat feet and big tummy and syringe-like nose but that was to be expected.  He was older than her, by quite a few years.  They were kind to each other.  
     He was cousin Hork's nephew he said, so they married after a long engagement and getting-to-know-you period before that.  And it worked.  (And they had oodles of children.)
The End

Friday, August 2, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Five, again)

     And then she went into a dungeon at least that's what he said, because nobody would take her he said and she had to pay for her crimes against the children, he said, although he had done worse.  She had friends, she said.  Her friends were the missionaries.  And Elvis Presley.  That was about it, you think, but no, she had many more friends.  She was not a Dolly Parton type but men flocked to her you think, but no, they merely secretly admired her.  You see she had big teeth like an Osmond and nice legs like a Betty Grable.  
To Be Continued

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (yes, we're still on Chapter Five)

     Now you may be wondering, what have I got into with this story.  Well don't worry, it gets better.  I think it gets better anyway.  They got together and separated a number of times, but never forever until the last time and then the dastardly man put her out on the street with all of her things except the books which she needed to teach school to the children and the clothes which she needed to wear and the hairpins and sequined dresses.  She had given those all away at his command, those sequined dresses.  He had said those were too loose on her figure.  She had nothing you think but no she had gummy bears to feed the children and a Book of Mormon and several suits of clothing for singing and dancing on stage (as if she felt like doing that) and her art materials which wowed her that she still had those because that made her life complete for the time being.
To Be Continued

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (yet more of Chapter Five)

      She had had it with mink by the third night you know and so had the kids.  That was another thing. They weren't kids, she said.  They were children.  But the relatives said kids and that was the way they stayed.  Kids.  Baby goats.  Not my choice, you would have said, if you'd been there.
     "I've had enough of this," said Gretchen.  "You don't like my cooking or my language," and they had to move on the four children and Mum before they had rooted in one spot.  They went home.  Wherever that was.
      I am writing this at 3.20 in the morning and I hope you can make sense of this but that's all there was.  At least that's the way she said it was.  But the neighbours knew better and knew that she was a blank and had blanked them with a blank blank, that's why they were all so good, blanking blank of kittens and suchlike.  They were temper tantrum children like her.  Not him.  He was blank.  He blanked the horses he blanked.
To Be Continued

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Five, More)

     So they parted company for a time.  They went to see the cousins in Utah in their palace.  They were Gretchen, the Ugly and her husband Prince Hork.  He raised pork with a name like that you think but no, mink.  They invited them in and made them at home.  They were citizens of the deli, and ate well, children with all that mink about, which they ate for supper, by the way.
To Be Continued

Monday, July 29, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Five)

     He knew best.  He always did.  At least he said he did.  Why I don't know.  He was always putting her down and she was always putting him on a pedestal with a "yes, dear", you think but no, she had to mind out of his way, before he did her harm, and they left, she and the four children who looked like her but not like him, he said.  Why they left, he didn't know, he said.  Perhaps she didn't like washing the dishes.  It couldn't be that he put her down all the time and blank blank blank.
To Be Continued  

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Four, Still)

      They blank blank blank, the wedding night was a flop.  She lived on her side of the house and he on his.  They had separate rooms and separate beds, cubbyholes for their clothes, you name it.  I don't know why they liked each other to begin with I would say if I were an onlooker, but I'm not, I'm their  
author and I know they weren't in love.
      He was an addled character.  They adopted four children and they all had hairy markings down their back, like their mother but he knew they weren't related to him because they looked like each successive man who'd been that way.  At least that's what he said.  They weren't his and they weren't hers because she was the mother but she wasn't the mother, if you know what I mean.  You don't get it and neither do I but that's what he said.
To Be Continued

Friday, July 26, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Four continued)

     That was the order of things.  But they were too young.  That was another thing you think.  No they were too young because they hadn't been through those two steps.  Otherwise they weren't too young.  They were old, in fact,  on her side.  She was an old unwanted thing, they said.  No one wanted her, if you want to be brutally honest.  But here parents blank blank blank.  They blank blank blank blank.
     That's why she was on the run from them.  She wanted to marry him and she was going to have her way.  She needed to have her way, she thought.  But no, she needed to calm down and he needed to calm down, if it were a simpler situation, but it wasn't.  Such is life.
      I don't know what they should have done about it.
      Nothing became of it.  Everything went wrong.
To Be Continued

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Three)

Chapter Three
      Matilda cried and cried and cried.  She would never see him again.  Her face looked like a Greek witch, he said.  How could she ever get over him?  She never would.  She knew it.  At least she thought she knew it.  So they married.

Chapter Four
     Now you may be wondering why they got married.  So was he.  He didn't want her.  She didn't want him, at least she said she did but it was all in her head, he said.  Sometimes it's that way.
      Why did they get married?  I don't know.  But I know one thing.  They shouldn't have got married. They should have waited until they knew each other better before dating and then waited longer before they were married.
To Be Continued


Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Two, I can't quite get to Chapter Three)

     Oh well, some people don't listen, and then they make mistakes.  Hesitate not, children, when the time comes, to benefit from this advice, and I will have done a good job, I think.  I am only an old woman, after all and have only this advice to give today.  Too old to knit, you say, but no, I do that on Saturdays.
      She sat up straight that girl, and so do you, but could you sit up straighter?  Yes, that's it.
      Now back to the story. 
      How many times a week have you been to the post office children?  There was a Greek witch at the post office you say and you never went there again.  Oh well, such is life.  I went to the post office one day and there was a Greek witch there too but Matilda LOOKED like a Greek witch and that was worse.
To Be Continued

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Two, still)

     The prince loved it too and so he invited her to a dance you think, but no that wasn't until he saw her legs.  She flounced her skirt and he looked her up and down and invited her to a dance, on account of her nice legs.  (She had to have some redeeming feature.)
     Her dancing was temporary until she slipped and fell and he bent and picked her up, you know and the mushroom jolted into the wrong place and gave her indigestion.  She was quite up in arms about it.
     "What shall I do next?  My dancing is over for the evening," she quipped to her fiance, which he was by this point.
     Now this wasn't wise, children, you know why?  This dancing I mean.  They got to know each other too quickly without the arms-length period at the beginning the Church recommends.  And the fiance thing, well, that was too fast too.  
To Be Continued

Monday, July 22, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Two continued)

Chapter Two, continued
     Was it that the Prince came by?  She only ate mushrooms on special occasions, you know.  Her mother couldn't understand it.  She scolded her for being so obstinate and poor Matilda cried.  She cried and cried you know.  Finally she died of grief nearly.  Parents shouldn't behave like that you know, but she did and her mother didn't, you think but no, it was her mother who did the fibbing that she was a nothing.  And so she ate a mushroom without shards of glass on it children, don't worry it wasn't THAT sort of mushroom with shards of glass on it, it was a HARD one with an apricot flavour and she simply LOVED it.
That's it for today, children.  Amen for now.

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter Two)

Chapter Two
     Every night for dinner, she had the same thing - brussel sprouts.  That was all she would eat.  Her nerves were such that was all she could take and she ate it anyway, you think despite her fat tummy but no her stomach got SMALLER when she ate it because it helped her liver.  
     Only a breath away was a Prince, but he was the wrong sort, he only wanted to dance, not play the fiddle as she did or sit at the harmonica playing it you think.  Oh no, that is a piano, I quite forgot myself, children, please excuse me.  Well back to the story.  There are some things you don't know unless the children tell you as an author, isn't that right, rickety author that I am.  It's my eyesight.  I thought that was a harmonica but I see that the artist has drawn a piano.  Flyspecks on my glasses, I expect.  Oh well.  
     Matilda was a glutton too and only ate the insides of the brussel sprouts.  She left the caps.  They have little caps on, didn't you know?  Does your mother take the caps off?  Ask her.  Oh I'm joking of course, and gluttons aren't picky eaters, I only thought I'd speculate as to what it was that made her eat a mushroom on that day in question.
To Be Continued

Friday, July 19, 2013

Matilda, The Ugly, A Romance (Abridged) by Joanne Okano (Chapter One) As Dictated To Me By Beatrix

Chapter One
     Once upon a time, an old widow had a daughter who was so ugly and witch-like that no one wanted her for a wife.  But she could dance and that led her to believe that she could have a chance at being a bride.
      She had a nose like a syringe, flat feet, nice legs from dancing, a big stomach from a bad liver, bad breath and big TEETH.
     The old widow remarried a young dude ranch owner and together they harassed poor Matilda, the Ugly, as she was known until she was livid.  She was such a nice girl when she wasn't livid, but when she was livid, watch out!
     She talked very fast about a lot of subjects including the price of electricity, the value of fasting and a variety of other things like dancing and why to dance.
     She had absolute hysteria if she saw a mole on your face, as it looked so wickedly ugly to her, but I suppose everyone has they own kind of ugly, just as everyone has they own kind of beautiful.
     "Scurvy is not a topic with which I am acquainted," she said one day to her maid, "but we could talk about that today, if you like.  I did have scurvy when I was eleven, I do remember, but I don't remember much about it."
     Running up and down stairs all day, that maid was, to keep Matilda busy with something to say, but that was all she did.  She was the Talking Maid.  Not that she did the talking.  There was the Walking Maid, the Misery Maid (for when she was in misery) and so forth and on and on it went until finally there was the Schooling Maid.  Matilda was a homeschooler of course and schooling was done at home.  She marched to the beat of a different drummer that girl, that was for sure!  
     An arrowroot cookie she had for breakfast, just like when she was a baby, then off to the schoolroom and fast asleep.  Until the teacher came that is, the Schooling Maid, and then she woke up.  
     The lessons consisted of 1, 2, 3, A, B, C and so forth until she got to Z and then she started at the beginning again and continued.  That was all she ever did.  She got her knowledge from at table for her talking bouts but people didn't see that as her schooling, but it was.  So far so good.
To Be Continued

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Achieving Happiness And Joy

     Happiness and joy is free for everyone.  Jesus came to earth so that we can have eternal happiness if we so choose.  There are lots of things that make us happy.  Being creative making drawings of all the instruments of the orchestra for my five year old daughter to colour made me feel happy and fulfilled.  Being a trainee doula at a birth made me feel happy.

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Cinnamon Roll Fun

     This morning I made a batch of cinnamon rolls for breakfast.  I thought they would take too long to rise but the book I was using, Whole Foods For The Whole Family from La Leche League, said I could use the rapid rise method in the oven for 20 minutes before they were baked!  They were so good.  And all without sugar.  Perhaps you could make them with your mother.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Quiet, Please

     I am writing a new story entitled Stand Up For Right, Mr. Horatio Crow.  Quiet, while I think, please.

Monday, June 24, 2013

The Benefits Of Journal-Writing

     I love writing in my journal.  But too often in the past I have been brief.  What a wonderful blessing it is to write in your journal and leave a record for your posterity, you think?  Yes, but I had not been writing enough at times.  And focusing on the positive at all times.  Yesterday I did both.  And did I ever feel good when I retired to bed, feeling the Holy Spirit, that I had done my best at journal-writing!

Saturday, June 22, 2013

Kitchen Comedy

Dear Readers,

     I thought this time, I'd tell you about my day.  I found a way to spend time with my youngest, Somerset Okano.  At 14, he's quite difficult to please.  He wants to go out and be with his friends.  I let him, but I also want to be with him too.
  
    My first kitchen comedy started earlier today when I was making supper.  I almost dropped a full pasta dish on the ground - oops!  Then I left the plastic wrap on and was about to put it in the oven when I realized what I was doing and took it off.   Later I made a cake mix go iffy by mixing it without the oil ingredient - who would have known that it would look nice without it?  At the last minute I spied the oil in a mixing jug at the side of the kitchen.  Always put your ingredients in one place where you can find them when you're baking a cake like I don't so you know what you're doing, children.  I put the cake in the oven and waited.  Then Somy and I sat down to cake and storytime, children.  Have you ever done that?  Well, I must tell you, it's fun.  We read two stories, children's stories mind you for Somy and me from a book you may remember from your youth, parents.  It's called Uncle Arthur's Storytime and it's about volume 12.

     There, I've said my part.  What about you?  What did you do today?  Write about it in your journal, if you like.

     All the best, Joanne

Friday, June 21, 2013

Excerpts From My Diary In '05 by Joanne Morris Okano

May 07 '05
Had a lovely day.  Had a funny time conducting music in Relief Society.  I almost missed conducting the second verse.  Then I conducted 3/4 time when it was supposed to be 4/4 time!  What a funny day.

May 10 '05
Had a nice time visiting children.  Brigham was doing his Spanish, Shoshana read my journal entry for the 07th and laughed.

May 11th '05
I saw love on the floor.  Love on the floor looks like this:  a cracker and a kinder spoon.  The cracker is wedged almost under the edge of the refrigerator.

May 12th '05
I am having a great day.  The Ungers are so kind to me.  Went home to see the children.  It was nice to see them.
Once upon a time there was a princess in a far away land.  She had many servants and they lived in a palace in a far away land.  They lived in the forest when they were wanted by the law and couldn't live at the palace but the law was wrong and they were the good guys.  Many people wanted to meet them but it was a long way to the forest and they couldn't meet them just yet.  They couldn't meet them at all. It was impossible.

May 13th '05
What a wonderful spirit there was at Stake Conference.

May 14th '05
What a wonderful night we had.  The children learned, Brigham and Paul that is, about Galileo and how he stood up for right and Nick played with his toy soldiers.  We went to Brother Styba's funeral and were very sad.

May 15th '05
I had a fine day.  I met a fine new friend today, a man.  My daughter made me proud tonight.  She led the Young Women's Values.  I got her books from the library.

May 16th '05
I had such a good day today.  I went home and taught Paul spelling and vocabulary, the spelling word meanings, and we read a French book together.  We love him.

May 17th '05
(Following are two sketches of dresses and a triangle.  No idea what that was about.)
Went home and saw the children.  Started on the reports.  Love them.  Felt great joy.

May 21st '05
Danced cheerfully to the Yugoslavian music.  Have a wonderful life.  Phoned the children four times today.

May 23rd '05
I had a nice day.  The sun was shining.

Fri
Walked and walked and walked and walked!  Had a nice time finishing my moccasins.

Sat
Had a nice time today.  Felt God's love pouring down from Heaven.

Tues
Joy was felt this morning.

Sat
Found joy in walking outside in the sunshine.

Sun
Had a lovely phone call with the boys.  What I love most about them is that they're nice people.

Mon
Went to the mall for Family Home Evening.  A beautiful evening - nice weather.

Tues
I went to Dundarave and had a fun time.  It was so fun.  The sun was shining.  I feel great about life.

Sun
I'm having a great day and miracles are happening.  Talked to Shoshana on the phone.  Love talking to her.

Mon
Had a nice walk through the shopping centre.  It was nice talking to the children today.

Sun
Made soybeans for lunch.  Had one of the loveliest days of my life recently.  Enjoyed my walk so much.

T
Really enjoyed my sleep last night.  Yesterday was misty rainy weather which I love.

W 29
Had a very funny day.  I couldn't decide what to do.  I phoned my children.  They weren't home.

F 31
Had a nice night's rest.  I really believe in love.

S
I miss the children.  I'm looking forward to seeing them.

W
Sunshine flowed in through the bedroom windows this morning.  Good day.  Great feelings.

T
I had a great time talking to Shoshana.  Be patient and all will be well.

W
Had a happy day.  Had a worth-it time.  Jesus loves us.  I can't believe what a nice day I had.
Memories are made that will never be forgotten.

Sat July
Had such a nice day yesterday.  My dress is coming along nicely.

Sun
Spent a worth-it time today.  Enjoyed thinking about the children.  I really enjoy life.  The Prophet loves us.
A shopping list
brown shoelaces
buckets
art materials
I phoned Somerset and had a nice conversation.

T
It was a sunny day at Dundarave.

W
I miss the children, Shoshana, Brigham, Paul, and Somerset.
Had a really nice time.  I'm having a really good time because I have the funnest time.  God loves us!

Th
I had a fine time at the mall after a good time with my children Paul, Brigham and Nick.  Shoshana was at Trek.

F
Lunch was so good.  I'm so thankful I get enough to eat.  Had a nice walk in the rain.

S
Made some new friends.
Walked to the beach.  Sat on a log and tied my homemade moccasins. Walked along the pier and looked out to sea.  Had a very fun time!

S
Enjoyed writing to Somerset yesterday.  Had a lovely day.  The weather was lovely and I enjoyed so much looking at the (trees) view, which is fabulous.  Wow!

M
Had a lovely walk in the sunshine to mail Shoshana's letter.  I sure love the sunshine.  I enjoyed writing to Shoshana in the night time.

T
I went out on a nice date ~.  Walked all over in the sunshine.  I had a pleasant morning and an even better afternoon having a nice day.   I went by myself.  I wanted to be with you guys - Shoshana, Brigham, Paul and Nick.

W
I had a nice day.  Went for a walk and how very much I enjoyed it!  I'm so glad I mailed Paul's letter!  How much I enjoyed lunch - liver, salad and potato.

T
What a very nice day I had yesterday walking out in the sun and the sand.  Enjoyed watching the birds, and seeing everything God made.

F
I had a good day.  I walked along the road.  I stayed out until 10.30 and my parents called the police.

Sat
Had a wuthering day.

Sun
I really miss those children.

Mon
A lot of people love us.

Tues
I really enjoyed writing to the children today.  I ate good soup potato-mushroom.

Th
I love my children and I miss them.

Fri
I have a compulsion obsessive compulsion called the Goldilocks syndrome.  I go from bed to sofa to sofa to bed to try to find somewhere comfortable to sleep.  To boot, the three bears are coming.

S
Wrote to Somy on his birthday (ahead of time, his birthday's on Wednesday  oh no it's on Friday or is it on Tuesday I can't remember).
Can't believe what's going on in my life - in a positive way of course!

M 9th A
I was ecstatic that Paul phoned.  I was scared of life but I'm realizing that life is better than it seems.

T 10 A
I had a very nice night.

W 11 A
I felt God's love all over Switzerland (Note:  I was in British Columbia).  The weather is beautiful.
I miss my children.  They are such a joy to me.  Listened to music today.  Wrote in my journal.  The Lord loves us!

F
Had a really nice day.  Walked a long way.

S
I had a great day today.  Auntie Pam and I are great buds.

S
Had a lovely day today.

Th
I'm so glad I'm having a wonderful day.  I'm having a great day sewing.

F
Sewed some.  Had a nice day.

Sunday
Today is a day of thankfulness.

Monday
Had a nice day dancing.

Wed
Pocahontas ate berries and juice. I wanted to see the children again.

Thurs
Had the best day of my life in a way.  I miss my children like the bees knees.  I saw a vision of them on the bridge.

Fri
I had a happy day.  It was happy.  I haven't had such a happy day in a year.

Sun
I had races over the hills. President Hinckley as I imagined ran down the hills and the giants ran after.  I'm a children's writer and that's what I saw.

     That's all the excerpts, children.  Ta-da!



Wednesday, June 19, 2013

17 New Words And Expressions and Customs I Learned When I Came From England To B.C.

1.  In England we said, "I puttered about all morning," whereas in B.C. we said, "I pottered about."
2.  In England there were lorries, and in B.C. there were trucks.
3.  In England sometimes people push into a queue (or barge into a queue),  whereas in B.C. sometimes people budge into a line.
4.  In England we have problems, whereas in B.C. we have issues and concerns.
5.  In England people eat courgettes (small) and marrow(big), and in B.C. we eat zucchini (big or small).
6.  In England we eat aubergine, and in B.C. we eat eggplant. 
7.  In England we visit the W.C., or better still we go to see a man about a dog, and in B.C. we visit the washroom.
8.  In England the police are sometimes called coppers and in B.C. they are sometimes called cops.
9.  This is not a new word or an expression, but another funny thing I found out when I moved here, is in England if you cry for a minute, someone hugs you and you get better in a minute and go on, whereas in B.C. if you cry for a minute they give you a pill and you're classed as sick (manic depressive) for years.  
10.  In England, children have Mummies and in B.C., Moms.
11.  In England we put the luggage in the boot of the car and in B.C., it goes in the trunk.
12.  In England there are bumps in the road to get you to drive slowly called "sleeping policemen" and in B.C. they are called "speed bumps".
13.  In England nursing a baby includes breastfeeding, bouncing him or her or your knee etc. whereas in B.C. it strictly means breastfeeding.
14.  In England the customs officials joke a lot, at least in the past, whereas in B.C., they prefer not to joke.
15.  In England some babies suck on a dummy and in B.C. the same thing is called a soother.
16.  In England they have au pairs, women who come from foreign lands to learn English in classes, and who look after the children for part of the day, and have part of the day off to go to class.  In B.C. I have never heard of an exact equivalent, although they do have homestay students.
17.  In England they have red double decker buses for the cities and towns and green line buses for the countryside.  In B.C., although they do have red double decker buses for tourists, they have buses for the city and the country that look the same except for smaller ones for little used routes.

Journal

     Yesterday I had one of the best days of my life.  I felt peace, joy and gratitude.  I enjoyed the warm summer sunshine.  I spent five minutes drawing a copy of a Richard Scarry fox.  Copying the work of another artist is a traditional way, over the centuries, for newbie artists to learn their craft.   I also spent another five minutes making guess what ?  a carrier pigeon out of origami, the ancient Japanese paper-folding art.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Flower Talk

     Flowers talk too you know.  One night I was lying in bed with the lights out when a flutey voiced so-and-so disturbed me, talking to the roses in the bedroom.
    
     "Mummy loves us, but she doesn't feed us any water."

     Oh, dear, I thought, I must do something about that in the morning.

     Next morning came and I went over to the plant in question and felt the soil.  Damp.

     "Joking!"  came the flutey voice.

Monday, June 17, 2013

The Prophet

     There is a prophet in our Church called President Monson.  He is 85 and over, I won't mention how old.  We listen to him and obey him if we are faithful members.  I have had many ups and downs in this area, so I won't brag about it.  Over and out.

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Learning About God As A Youngster

     In our Church, we have something called Family Prayer and Family Scripture Study.  We try to be consistent on a daily basis, calling together our families to pray twice daily and study the word of God once each day.  It is amazing to me, that children from very young and young people into their teens are willing and eager to come and learn more about God because they want to go to Heaven.  It is the father's duty to gather the family together for this purpose, or the mother's if there is no father in the home.  If you call and they don't come for study and prayer time, you are just supposed to go ahead and read scriptures and pray without them though, so it is not a forced thing, but I find that unless mine are sleeping or out or busy doing something they can't easily break off from right away (in which last case we usually wait until they are ready to come to the table because they are usually willing) they rally to the table soon.

Friday, June 14, 2013

Springbok, The Kitty's Further Adventures

     Just at that moment a bark was heard.  It was Eli, the new dog.
     Oh no, a dog, too?  thought Springbok and Elizabeth.  Where did he come from?  The garden, it seemed, with muddy paw prints all over the furniture too.  What a mess he was.  He was quickly ushered out by the new owner.  Where have my owners gone to?  queried Springbok to himself.  Everything was changing and in an uproar.  Have you ever had that happen?  When everything in life seems strange?  I have, when my children were taken away.
      My children got taken away and I didn't know what had happened to them.  Things were strange and I didn't know what to make of it.
      Eli,  the dog, didn't know what was happening either.  Sometimes nobody knows what is happening.  It's that way sometimes.
     But Eli got to know Elizabeth and her partner and got to love them.  It's that way sometimes.  So don't worry if things don't turn out the way you want, sometimes better things happen.

The End


Thursday, June 13, 2013

Springbok, The Kitty

      Springbok, the kitty, came in through the cat-door and smelled something suspicious.  There was another cat in the house.
      Springbok roamed around looking for clues.  Who had taken over his domain?  The next clue he found was the body of a mouse.  It was on the kitchen floor.  Someone had taken over his duties.  Who was it, he wondered?  Then there was the limit.  He found someone, a tabby cat, sleeping in his bed, of all places.  He was a polite cat, so he waited until the stranger woke and then asked his name.
       Elizabeth, she purred.
       That's a girl's name, he thought.  Pleased to meet you, he quickly replied.

The End

Thought for the day

It matters what you do with your life, not just what happens to you.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Monday, June 10, 2013

Family Home Evening Prayers Are Answered

Dear Readers,

     Tonight I had prepared a lesson on how to make and keep friends, after praying for guidance about what my family needed to hear about.  When my sons Paul and Somy arrived at my home tonight Paul was wondering aloud how he could make more friends!  So it was what he needed.  We sang The Happy Wanderer too, and played a board game.  Both boys were so kind and well behaved.  We had a very nice evening, all in all.

All the best,
     Joanne

Friends

It's nice to see old pictures of relatives and friends.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Angels Sing

     I am still looking for a husband.  The angels sing for me when I think about two guys I like.  I asked the Lord why it is taking so long for me to find a husband and the answer I received is that I am so funny to watch when I am looking for a husband.

Thought For The Day

You never know what will turn up, because life is full of little surprises...

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Homeschooling In Heaven - Part 4

     Moated sandcastles were built and it was time to wend their way home and make supper.  As the sun was setting they sang Primary songs until they reached the path to their home.  The slow cooker supper was ready, Mummy remembered and slowed down to make a phone call to Dad.

      "Finished making a world for the day?"  she said, like a queen.
      The volume went up in the room and the children, Shoshana, Brigham, Paul and Somy, had fun dancing around in a circle to music on the stereo.  Mummy fled to the bedroom to hear the rest of the telephone conversation and reassure Daddy that dinner would indeed be ready when he arrived home that night.  It was goulash, Daddy's favourite.  A few minutes later, he came through the door, greeted by everyone warmly.  The music went lower in volume and they all sat down gladly to eat supper after a prayer.  After dinner, Oma Verwest came round and handed out candies for everyone from her all-inclusive handbag.  Also Grandma Morris came by, who although during her life on earth carried a bottle of alcohol in her handbag was in Heaven a drinker of wine, but didn't carry it in her handbag.  (Jesus drinks wine in Heaven.)

      They had their lessons at the seaside for the rest of the week and then they came home and baked apple turnovers.

The End

Homeschooling In Heaven - Part 3

     When the children had finished making their Hispanic dioramas, they all trooped down to the sea for the rest of the day.

     Now I have to explain something here.  There were four children in this family, but Somy, the youngest, chose to attend school so he could be with his friends.  After one day however, he decided he'd seen his friends and came home to be with the family.  So over the sand dune with Aunt Lily came Somy.

To Be Continued

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Thought for the day

Enjoy life!  Savour every minute!
I enjoy life more when I eat wheat berries and bulgar wheat more and eat less bread because I am healthier and have a better quality life.

Homeschooling In Heaven continued Part 2

     So now was their chance.  The children played a bit of leapfrog out on the lawn and then came inside for a talk on the history of Spain from Mother, about Moors and Jews and Christians living together in harmony .for several hundred years.

To Be Continued

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

The Homeschooling Family In Heaven

     Once upon a time, there was a happy mother in her kitchen, singing to herself.  Her children were out in the garden, playing.  They were in Heaven.

     Once upon a time on earth, their house had been caught in a huge rainstorm that turned into a flood and swept them all away and they had never been able to homeschool as they wished.

To Be Continued

Monday, June 3, 2013

Misfortunes Of Youth

     When I was seven years old, I lived in Keston, and attended Baston School, going to Brownies as well.  I was eager to learn.  We were learning to catch a ball and unfortunately I caught the ball in my eye three times in one week.  So much for that.  I decided I liked learning but playing catch was not on the top of my list.
     As I grew up I tended to avoid ball games, sitting on the sidelines whenever possible.  But one day, something happened.  A man at a volleyball game asked me why I wasn't playing.
      "Oh," I said, "I can't catch".
     He said, "You try to catch, and I'll stand here, and every time you make contact with the ball, I'll applaud".
     So I tried.  I never actually caught the ball, but every time my fingers brushed by it, he cheered and clapped.  I enjoyed that game so much.  If only we could all have friends that nice.

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Letters In The Mail

     Children really like it when you send them a letter.  I remember the joy with which I used to receive postcards and letters from my relatives when I was young.  I felt so important when something arrived in the post for me.

Friday, May 31, 2013

Best Friends

If I ever find you, we could be friends perhaps, but I already have so many best friends I don't think the circle could be widened any larger.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Folding Sheets For Eternity

      I used to take a midwifery homestudy course quite a few years ago but I gave up.  Recently the Spirit whispered to me to finish the course and that Heavenly Father does not want me to be a quitter or I'll be folding sheets for eternity in Heaven!

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

A Poem About Losing Weight

I've changed what I eat
To lose weight.
But what I eat now
Is so gross
I don't want
To eat much of it.

Monday, May 27, 2013

A Tribute To My Mother

     My mother who listened patiently to hour after hour of faulty playing on the piano, recorder, guitar et cetera at home in my youth and in the car in certain circumstances while she was driving, has been in my thoughts lately as a very kind lady in this way.  How she could stand it must have something to do with being related to me as I find other people can't, whether or not I make mistakes, in some circumstances.

Hello Friends

     Hello Friends,

      How was your day?  Mine wasn't so-so, it was awesome.  I wrote several emails to my daughter who is on a mission for the Church and one fanmail email, I won't tell you who to.  My daughter had a baptism on Saturday, she was telling me.  Isn't that great?
     I also did laundry and research and made supper.  Tonight is Family Home Evening.  The lesson is on Love At Home and we are celebrating my son's birthday.  He just became an elder.

     Best wishes,  Joanne

Saturday, May 25, 2013

The Word Of Wisdom And How It Helps

     I went to the doctor and he didn't exactly read me the riot act but he told me I needed to lower my blood sugar and my cholesterol levels.  When I got home, I decided to look at the scriptures.  In the scriptures, in a book we call the Doctrine and Covenants, is the Word of Wisdom, which is the Mormon health code.  I decided to reread it and try to live it better, in addition to losing weight, which I was already doing.  Hurray!  I found an answer.

Friday, May 24, 2013

What I think about housecleaning

     I love a clean house.  I just don't want to do it all of the time.  I love doing it for a job.  When my children were small, I put the family first and tended to their needs before anything else and did about seven years of breastfeeding, and a few years of homeschooling that way.  And yet my home was most of the time, not a wreck, but in good shape.  I just involved the children in picking up after themselves.  My daughter even had a tidy-up song she made up herself.  She sang it as she picked up her toys.  (And my husband helped too.)

Be Good

     Children, have you ever noticed how the good guys always win?  (And girls?)  Do you know why that is?  In books the plots may not be very life-like all the time but usually good wins at the end.  That is because that is the way it is in life.  So do not be alarmed if someone doesn't show off their niceness and puts you down for no reason at all, tells lies about you even.  All will come out right and you will be victorious over evil if you keep on being good.  Amen.

English Police Officers On Horseback

     In England they have police officers on horseback too in the country areas sometimes.
     Another sight in England is old Victorian letterboxes.  They are red and have the letters VR on them.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

A Good Book I Read Tonight

     I was using Kapit and Elson's Anatomy Coloring Book tonight and learned much about the muscles of facial expression.  God gave me a mind and I'd better use it!

Saint Clare's Hall

     When I was a young woman, I attended a college prep school called Saint Clare's Hall.  It was owned by Oxford University.  We were allowed to attend their clubs days and join their clubs.
     I joined the Rock and Roll Club, as it was called.  We did jiving to '50s music.  I loved it.  A young man I met there became my friend.  He was kind to me and I had a good time.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Rome, Italy

     On the subject of concierges of hotels, I will never forget the hotel concierge we met in Rome, Italy. He looked just like a young Luciano Pavarotti and had a dry sense of humour when my mother and I went to stay there.
      And another man I will never forget, is the bus tour guide on the island of Capri in Italy.  He said he was of Greek descent and called the tourists on the bus names like Mr. and Mrs. Tokyo, or Mrs. Canada, depending on where they came from.

Medina Del Campo, Spain

     While I was in my early twenties, I went to Medina Del Campo, in Spain.  I went in by train, in the heat of the day and walked down a little tree-lined avenue on the parched ground, past little old people sitting on benches and silently or holding conversations, keeping each other company, to a hotel concierged by a woman who looked like my mother.
     I asked for a room for the night and she led me to a room overlooking a medieval tower, a room fit for the Queen of Sheba in my opinion, where I spent the night and then passed on to another town on the train the next day.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Saved By Ravioli

      I was on a ferry crossing the Channel between England and France, the boat tipping from stem to stern, and everybody running for the side, when an idea occurred to me.
      "Ravioli," I thought.  "That would do it."
      I had the comforting taste of ravioli in my mouth before I knew it and was over the biliousness of the day.  Saved by ravioli!

God's Joke

     Last night as I was lying awake, I was wondering what to do to get back to sleep.  I got up and read Robinson Crusoe for a few pages, then dipped into my favourite book The Observer's Book of British Grasses and of course the Bible.  Then I wondered what should I do next when a voice in my head, God I thought, said, "What about a little dancing?"  He knows I love to dance, but three o'clock in the morning is not the time.

I Love Lucy

     One day while driving through Beverly Hills on a bus tour, we saw the famous lady Lucille Ball of comedy fame picking up her mail from her mailbox outside her house.  She gave us a wave and a smile and I have never forgotten her.
      Years later in Hollywood again, my husband and I were sitting outside at a restaurant when a Lucille Ball look-a-like came outdoors and threw up her hands in horror and dismay that I was wearing a similar outfit to her.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Last Night I Watched The Show "Doc Martin" on PBS

      "Doc Martin" is a British medical series on t.v. which I find usually good.  Most of the time, it is the only show I watch on t.v. all week.  The plot was so intriguing of last night's show,  I told it to my children today.

Friday, May 17, 2013

My Day At Hampton Court

     When I was a big girl, my school, Baston School, took us all on a field trip to Hampton Court Palace for the day, where King Henry VIII lived.  I got stuck in the maze of course and had to be fished out by a police officer.  The maze is taller than a human being and made out of hedges.  I had been lost in it for about an hour and it was time to go home, when a friendly face and a copper badge appeared over the top of the maze climbing on a ladder and asked if I was Joanne Verwest.  I said yes and was rescued.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

The People - Part Eleven - The Conclusion

     The characters found Mabel and told her of their desire to star in a tale.  Can you guess what she did?  She wrote notes for the tale on her napkin (the usual place).  The conference resumed and she attended a class on the motif of tragedy in Irish literature and Spanish literature (and wrote an essay on it in Spanish).
    After the conference the writers Andy and Mabel bussed home and sat next to each other on the bus (and nearly held hands on the bus).
     Years later, they dated.  Mabel published a children's tale about five bears in a canoe and married her next door neighbour.  Can you guess who that was?


The End
 

The People - Part Ten

     The police came and managed to cajole the raging river back into its cupboard.  With a little coaxing, it gushed obediently back in.

      Mabel and Andy sat and ate their bagel.  The five restless characters looked around sheepishly at the mayhem they had caused and giggled to themselves.  Everyone went outside to dry off in the sun.

That's all for today, folks

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

The People - Part Nine

     Andy and Mabel, later, in dry clothes, headed for the writer's conference and sat down, after registering.
     The conference facilitators were just introducing the speaker when a curious sound was emitted from Mabel's stomach and out of her ear shot the five restless characters in their canoe on the raging river.  The river soon filled the hall and the conference attendees clung to their chairs as they bobbed up and down in the water.
     Mabel had fortunately bought a bagel for her lunch  before sitting down at the conference so she had something to eat, but Andy had nothing.
     "Here, have some of mine," she cried out to him over the din of the river as he floated by her.  She passed him a half of her bagel.
     "Thank you," he shouted back.

To Be Continued

Monday, May 13, 2013

Kindness Begins With Me

     If others are not kind to you, be kind to them and maybe they'll follow along.  If they do not, try praying for them and maybe that will help.

The People - Part Eight

     Well, children, by the time you read this I will be visiting the doctor, so please wish me hope.  I have been rehearsing what I will say to him so that I do not become hysterical.  

     It was time for the passengers to alight from the bus at Montreal.  Can you guess where Handy Andy was going?  As it turns out, he was a writer in his spare time, like his neighbour Mabel, and was also attending the conference.  They crossed a bridge when Mabel's prize possession blew over the edge, her essay in Spanish on the symbolic meaning of the labyrinth motif in Hispanic literature.  She (unwisely) climbed down to get it and had to be rescued by Andy.  She lost her essay.
     "Never mind," he said, "You can write another one."

To Be Continued

The People - Part Seven

     The fish was dead and the five restless characters ate it for supper.  The fish hadn't done anything wrong, but God gave us fish to eat and when a fish is dead, you can eat it.
      The twins opened the fourth door and found a cookery course is fifteen volumes, a set of golf clubs, an Italian garden, a television set which turned into a bed when you jumped upon it (the twins tried), and a raging river.
     Mamquiso cooked them a meal the next day while the others played golf and wandered through the Italian garden and then the twins slept in the bed, while the others slept on the floor.
      The raging river was very small, and looked the right size to fit into Mags' box, if he packed it intelligently.  The twins were just about to open the fifth door, but before they did, the raging river started to grow and was soon up to the characters' knees and gushed down the hall, through the room with the filing cabinets and all the way to the bleachers.  The twins struggled over to the fifth door and opened it and out fell a canoe.  They all jumped in, just as the river rose to waist level, and swept them through a door, down a flight of stairs, and along a corridor.  Otters were swimming alongside them.

To Be Continued

Friday, May 10, 2013

The People - Part Six

     By this time, the pizza man arrived at the front door, rang the door bell and said,
     "Ma'am, Are you in labour?  The neighbour said you sound as if you're having a baby."
     To which Able Mable replied,
     "Dear, this is a bee sting, not a baby!"  paid for the pizza, thanked him and shut the door.

     "Can we take the day off, please, to lay in the sun and read a book?"  said Mags to the other restless characters.
     "No way!  You want to do that too?"  said Vigor.  "Let's build the university and make our way to the university library for a good read."
     After a lot of hard work and sweating, the university was ready.  They read on the lawn.  Catalan poetry.

     Able Mabel threw out the trash, while looking in the paper at the want ads.
WANTED
Writers for writers' conference.
July 4th, Montreal 
     Following were the details of time and address for the conference.   Able Mabel's eyes lit up.  She ran downstairs to her room, threw all her favourite clothes into a suitcase, ran back up the stairs and out the door, locking it behind her.  She hurtled along the sidewalk, eight blocks along the street to the bus station, arriving just in time to catch a bus to Montreal.

     She was just launching into a conversation with a Scandinavian backpacker on the price of figs, when unbeknowns to her, Handy Andy boarded the same bus and sat two rows back of her next to a model who looked like Jesus but made no claims to be able to walk on water.  The model did however share his lunch with the passengers, and there was enough for everyone.

To Be Continued

Thursday, May 9, 2013

The People - Part Five

     The five restless characters swung along the pipes a ways until they came to a room with filing cabinets in it.  They looked inside the filing cabinets until one of the twins found a sheaf of papers referring to the five of them.
    
     "It says we like canoes and we're good at exploring," she said.
     "No wonder we were so restless," marvelled the other.

     They set out to look for a canoe.  After making their way down a series of hallways, they entered a brightly lit gymnasium with a stage at one end.  Under the stage were five cupboard doors, which they began opening to look for a canoe.

     Out of the first cupboard fell lots of things - including directions in Latin for founding a medieval university, and a leather box with precious stones in the top.  Magilllaquiso liked the box so he took it to keep the sheaf of papers in.  Out of the second cupboard door fell a violin, a costume wardrobe and house plans for building a castle.  Mamquiso took the violin and they all put on bear costumes.  Mags as we shall call him for brevity, took the castle plans and placed them in his box.  When they opened the third cupboard, only a laugh came out of the darkness.  Mamquiso decided that whatever was making the laugh was friendly and crawled inside and found a laughing fish.  Mags put it in the box with the papers.

To Be Continued

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

The People - Part Four

     Able Mabel was out in the sun, hoeing in her garden in a straw hat with a wide brim and pink ribbons and a long floral dress and boots.  Her new neighbour whom she hadn't met yet, whose name was Andy or Handy Andy as people called him because he could swim like the dickens and rescue you if you were drowning, looked over the fence and saw her.  He liked her, but he'd had enough diving into the water to rescue people for one day, so he went inside and had a nap.

     The five restless characters had been waiting for six years for the writer to put them into a story or a poem and give them something to do, but every time they tried to attract her attention she would get a headache and go into the kitchen and make cinnamon toast, or order a pizza, or go on holiday.  (She sold watches to toddlers so she could afford to go on holiday.)

     A bee stung Able Mabel.
     "Ouch!"  she screamed and went inside.  "I feel a headache coming on.  I must be allergic to bee stings."

     The five restless characters felt so restless that they stood up on the bleachers and began swinging from the pipes along the ceiling.  The writer went for the kitchen in a hurry and made a whole loaf of bread into cinnamon toast.  This didn't seem to help, in fact the headache was getting worse, so Able Mabel phoned and ordered a pizza with irregular toppings because she was feeling muddled.

      "Chocolate and tofu toppings please," she quipped on the phone.
     "I beg your pardon, Ma'am?"  said the puzzled fellow at the call centre.  "Uh, I'll see what I can do...".
       She plumped herself down on a chair, put her head on the table, and waited for the pizza man, moaning as if she were in labour.

To Be Continued

The People - Part Three

     Three of the restless characters had names - Princess Mamquiso, Prince Magilllaquiso, and Prince Vigor - which they wore as hats.  Prince Magilllaquiso wore three tall black plumes in his hat, for the three 'l's.  The other two, who were twin sisters, had not yet reached their eighteenth birthday so they had no names and, therefore, no hats.

To Be Continued Tomorrow

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

I Enjoy Giving Talks

     I am normally a shy person but I enjoy giving talks because the words are written in front of me and I don't have to remember what to say.  I have given a few talks in church.

The People - Part Two

     I wondered if you would like to hear a recent addition to the story, so I put it in...

     Now when I was a little girl, I had a Great Aunt Mabel, Able Mabel they called her, who hailed from Yorkshire.  Now the writer featured in this story was a girl, so I've decided to name her Able Mabel.  Our Able Mabel in this story could always come up with some story to tell her younger siblings so they wouldn't fight, or so they'd go to sleep, or so they'd sit quietly and wait for their Father to come and check under their beds for boogeymen.

To Be Continued Tomorrow

Monday, May 6, 2013

The People Who Wore Their Names As Hats

     Here is a story I wrote in the days when typewriters were the in thing...

      Once upon a time, there were five restless characters sitting (among thousands of patient characters) on the bleachers in a writer's imagination.

To be continued tomorrow

Friday, May 3, 2013

Plans for Heaven with Oma

     Did you ever plan to do some enjoyable thing, but mislay your plans?  When I was a teen I went on a bus trip to Cambridge with my school, Saint Clare's Hall, and we stopped at a trout fishery.  There they sold trout recipes at a bargain price.  I bought two sets and gave one to my Dutch grandmother, Oma as I called her, and kept the other in my journal.  One day I'll make those, I said to myself.  But I have moved and lost them.  Oma passed on to the next world, but I hope that if I make it to Heaven that she and I will have happy times preparing trout recipes together.  She learned to speak English by studying in the King James Version of the Bible from the 1600s, so she is lots of fun to talk to.  She is lots of fun because she is my grandma, but she also uses some quaint expressions from the Bible.  If you want to know how to get to Heaven, ask the missionaries, they will help you!  They can also get you your own Bible free.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

After the chocolate binge, I listened to Classical music and felt much better

     I did chores this morning, did some background preparation for writing, and ate chocolate.  I did some walking too.  After the chocolate binge (I tried to share the gospel with somebody yesterday and it didn't turn out and I felt down, that's why I had the chocolate binge), I listened to Classical music and felt much better.  I got some indexing done, learned about the bones and ligaments of the foot, found out that the composer's name which eluded me was, not Clarence Eldridge but Percy Grainger, of In An English Country Garden.  I had clams for supper and phoned my boys to see how they were doing and invite them for a birthday party for my second son Paul.  What a funny day!

My wish for you

May your day be off the Richter Scale with joy

The Update On My Children Sister Okano, Brigham, Paul and Somerset

Dear Readers,

     My daughter Sister Okano is serving a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  She is at the MTC (Missionary Training Centre).
     Brigham is landscaping and taking pizza orders to earn money for his future mission he hopes to serve.
      Paul is playing drums and saxophone and trumpet at school, taking pizza orders to save up for his mission, and taking his IB (International Baccalaureate).
      Somerset, otherwise known as Nick, is at high school and is bursting out dancing every now and then for joy, as well as playing trumpet in the school Jazz Band.
      They are wonderful children and I love them very much.

      Joanne Okano

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

My motto

Every day has something new to look forward to

We went to a market

     One of my favourite childhood memories was when I was about eleven years of age.  My mother and father had a great idea of taking my sister and me to a street market which sold antiques.  The market was in London, England near where we lived and started early in the morning.  We drove into town in the wee hours in the winter, just before Christmas, and sat down to a delicious fried breakfast in a restaurant.  It was the most fantastic visit to a market I've ever had!

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

High-Need Babies

     I recently read an article about babies, and remembered a day when my first baby Shoshana was about two weeks old.  It was nine o'clock at night and I had had such a full day looking after her - she was in need of being held almost ALL the time - that I was still in my dressing gown from that morning, and was in the process of making supper, when an unfortunate salesperson happened to come on the telephone line and tried to sell me educational insurance for my child whilst I was looking after the baby and burning the liver and bacon.  I was not in a happy mood and told them so.  Now, looking back it makes me laugh!

Back again...

     Two can openers later, come to think of it if you can make good can openers, there is definitely a place for you in this world!  We need you!  Come out of your shell and make those can openers.
There are places for kind doctors and nurses too dear, but I just want you future can opener makers to know there is a purpose for you too in life.  Everyone everywhere has a purpose!
     I have just spent the last little while indexing.  And if you want to know what indexing is, go to the missionaries, they will help you.

Friday, February 8, 2013

A While Off

     I will be taking a while off my blog to do some other things...Probably mid-August, I'll be back.  So I'll see you then.

Argument With God

     I have just finished having an argument with God.  My first one, as I remember.  It went something like this:

Me (whiningly):  God, can I have another can opener? (as I fractiously opened a can in a not very efficient manner, leaving it half unopened, nearly, because the can opener doesn't work).

God's reply:  You haven't even thanked me for this one.

Me (fractiously):  Thank You very much for this useless can opener.

God's reply:  Well, it is better than nothing.

Dancing On The Table

     When I was a little girl, there was a t.v. commercial that I particularly enjoyed of a certain brand of French fried potatoes, where the mother, after preparing a meal, gets up on the kitchen table and does a spirited dance.  To which the father replies, "She's a wonderful mother".

     This has influenced my whole life.

The Scent Of Cilantro

     I do so love the scent of cilantro.  Could someone please write a symphony expressing the scent of cilantro, among other herb scents?  I would love to listen to it if they did!

Little Piffy Looks At Herself In The Puddle

      Little Piffy was an ugly brute, or so everyone said at school.  She knew it must be true, because everyone said it.  It was that way, for sure, she said, or they wouldn't go on about it so much.

     Then one day she happened to be walking along a side-street of the main thoroughfare of town (you'll know what that means when you are older - just bear with me for now) when she stepped right in the middle of a big puddle.  Oh, joy, there was a child there in the puddle.
 
     Now what did she see?  Herself.  But she didn't know it was her.  She thought it was some beautiful child.  But it was her.  How could she be beautiful?  Everyone said she was an ugly brute, or so their mothers said in one case and so the news spread.  Why?  Because she had disgruntled her.

     So when someone calls you a name, ask Why.

     Now on to the rest of the story.  Why?  Piffy asked herself.  Why I disgruntled her?  Because my mother taught me that way.  But now I know that's wrong and I don't behave like that anymore.  But I'm still an ugly brute, because I behaved like that once.  Isn't that funny?  But the child here is beautiful, and that must be me, the real me.  End of story.

      There, wasn't that funny?  Have you had that happen to you, children?

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Journal

     Sometimes people say you should live life always doing exactly as you please, but I don't agree that that is always the case.  Sometimes people ruin their lives by doing exactly as they please.  A safer idea is to do exactly as God pleases, He knows what is best for us and what will make us happy in the long range, so we can return home to live with Him and our family.  Have a nice day!

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Macaroni For Breakfast

     I made macaroni last night and here's why:  I needed something quick and easy for breakfast, so I could read my scriptures in bed.  I'm reading The Book Of Mormon.

Journal

     I'm making a Montessori Reading Kit.  What fun!  You make it out of paper and you write little words on it and then you put them in boxes.

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Families Are Where It's At

Families are where it's at
I like time to myself
But I like time to be with my family
Even more.

Scripture Reading Is A Must, Children, If You Want To Survive Spiritually In The Latter Days

     Dear Children,
 
      If you want to survive spiritually in these latter-days, you need to read your scriptures.  Then you will know the way to go to follow Jesus Christ in life.

      Bye!

Journal

     Last night I had a very vivid dream of a beetle named Kagemusha who was in love with me because I was so kind to him.  He was an armoured beetle and lived in a bowl of soap.  That was all I remember of the dream although there was a lot more to it at the time, with other characters and happenings.  If only I could remember!

Monday, February 4, 2013

Fun Family Home Evening

     Tonight we all participated and did hymn singing, praying, followed by a lesson on loving others and a fast-paced fun activity where we did a workout on towels on the floor.  We had a treat (pears) and the atmosphere was really nice.  I felt like crying afterwards, with joy.

Do You Know Who Your Grandparents Are?

     Do you know your Grandparents' names and where they were born and their birth dates?  It might be useful some time when you are older and making up a family tree with them on?  A family tree is a chart where you show who you are related to.  On my family tree it shows that, for instance, I am descended from a baker named Mr. Batenburg.  This makes me wonder are we related to the baker who invented Batenburg Cake, the pink and yellow cake with squares in the middle?  You can find out all kinds of interesting things about your family when you do your family history.  I hope it goes well.

Journal

     Yesterday was a once-monthly meeting we Mormons call "Fast And Testimony Meeting".  If the Holy Spirit inspires you you may go up to the front, at any age, young or old, and bear a testimony to tell people how God is helping you.
       Yesterday I went up and said my testimony, that I know that Jesus is the Christ (the Messiah) and that I know that He is my friend.  Then I sat down again.
     In the evening all four of my children came round for dinner with my daughter's boyfriend and we had chickpeas for dinner.

Saturday, February 2, 2013

Recipe: Chickpea Curry

Here is a recipe you will likely want to make again and again...

Ingredients:
3 cans drained and rinsed chickpeas
1 cup (preferably new) ketchup
2 Tablespoons curry powder
1 cup vegetable stock or water

Method:
Place all ingredients in a slow cooker and stir until well mixed.  Cover.  Set on Low for 8 hours to 10 hours or High for 3 hours to 4 hours.  When ready, turn off the heat and serve with a meat dish (especially if you have a Dad), a pot of rice and a salad.  Serves 3-4.  Voila!

The Dusty Home

      Once upon a time, there was a dusty house.  It moaned and grimaced under the load.  If only someone would dust it.
     So she came with a dustpan and brush.  The shelves, the shelves, cried the insane house, insane from dustiness.  She came with troupes of children with damp dusters and had a dust-a-thon around the house, with glee, and everything was safe.  No dust mites.  Ah, said the house, now I can relax.

A Merry-Go-Round World, Isn't That What We Live On, Children?

     One day, Jesus was up in Heaven with the children who were about to come to earth.  He said to them the following quip...
     "The world you're going to is a merry-go-round and you have to jump on at the right spot or you don't go.  Got that ?"

Journal

     I had assembled a Greek dish, Pastitsio, the night before and placed it foil-covered in the refrigerator, so I baked it last night for supper.  The boys and I quite liked it.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Truffles Are My Favourite

     "Truffles are my favourite kind of vegetable," said the hog.  "I wonder why?"
     "Perhaps it's the texture," said another.
      "Or the odour," said a third.
     "I don't know quite what I like about them either," said a fourth.
     "Let's have some."
     All agreed on that.  Amen.

Journal

     Last night I had a nightmare - eek! - that I was in a building that was about to fall down, and that I was rescued from it at the very last minute.  I was assigned to a new building where things also went awry.  Then I awoke, with tangled bed sheets, like little Somerled in The Society Of Harpsichord Builders.  It was most frightening.

Thursday, January 31, 2013

Recipe For Motherhood Bliss

     Take one family, the Gospel and a home filled with love.

     Make dumplings sometimes ~
     Breastfeed your babies with the guidance of La Leche League ~
     Drink herbal teas for health ~
     Make your own herbal remedies, like cough syrup, for your family ~
     Do tie-dye ~
     Homeschool your children and read up on homeschooling enough beforehand and while doing it ~
     Go out for visits to the library and to Grampa and Gramma ~
     Use Gail Sforza Brewer's recipe book when you're pregnant ~
     Use a La Leche League recipe book when you're nursing ~
     Learn about your body ~

Little Mussel Maiden

     This is a tale of Little Mussel Maiden who ate so many mussels that she grew into a mussel.  End of story.
     Her mother told her no, but she would eat them.  Gradually, her face and her hair all grew mussel-like.  She was a great person though, and everyone loved her.
     One day she found a penny.  She put it into her mouth and it turned into a pearl.  Don't you do this though children.  Keep your teeth clean and white by brushing them and not putting pennies and other foreign substances in.
     One day a whale came by.
     "Hey, a mussel," he said.  "With a human body.  How curious,"  and swam off.
The End

Journal

     Today is a new day.  I like new days.  They're full of possibilities.  And I don't mean winning the lottery.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Playing Piano

     When you play, little ones, you can feel each note like connoisseurs of the music, don't you think?  (Look up "connoisseurs" in the dictionary, then you won't drive Mummy batty.)

Work, More Work

      I am happy to say that I have had a Faberge egg experience.  I awoke at 1.30a.m., sat up and read my scriptures, wrote the ending to my novel, read several other books, took a nap, about seven, typed up a few pages, washed windows and floors and mirrors and vacuumed, walked and ate lunch, worked like an eagle looking for mice in the forest to eat I did.  Now I'm done with the house-cleaning but it's back to the typing in a bit God willing if there's no power outage.  This is unusual for me because usually I'm a slow starter.

"Do, Don't Just Watch," I Said To Myself

     When I was a little toddler to when I was a teen, I liked to watch people do things.  On stage.  Like dance, sing, play-act and so on.  Then I got to thinking, I would like to do something myself.  Even if I was a failure at it, I would like to get up and perform.  End of story.
    

Letter To The Children

Dearest Children,

     How are you?  I hear you have had exams recently.  Did you get your marks back yet?  How did they go?  I used to dislike exams immensely.  I usually had hay-fever, which meant I couldn't concentrate because I was sneezing so hard and wound up failing a few.  Other than that I did fine you think, but no I didn't.  My math was the pits, at one point, I couldn't pass a math exam.  I couldn't find a job sometimes.  Like now.  I have been furiously writing to try and get something published.
     I love you, my chickadees.  All the best for a great day, Love and hugs,
     Mummyxxxxxooooooxxxxxoo

Journal

     This morning I went for a walk in my pajamas in the living room before starting up the stove for scrambled eggs on toast.  What a good meal that was!  Now I feel ready to go.  Isn't that amazing.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Recipe: Three Sauced Ham With Rice And Pita

     Here is a delicious recipe you can make with Mummy.  It takes quite a bit of washing up in the pan region but I'm sure you won't mind that as it's so good.
     Ingredients:
     1 pouch of gravy mix powder - 500grams of sour cream - 1 breakfast ham - 1 can tomato sauce - 1 cup rice - water - salt - 6 pita bread rounds

     Method:
     1.  Make the gravy, following the directions on the gravy mix pouch.
     2.  Warm the breakfast ham in the oven on 350F for one hour.
     3.   Warm the contents of tomato sauce can on medium low in a saucepan, opening the can carefully.
     4.  Bring rice to a boil with 2 cups of water and 1 teaspoon of salt, then cover and turn down to low for 15 minutes.
     5.  Make the pita bread if you are baking it from scratch, it is easy to make.  Mollie Katzen's Moosewood Cookbook has an easy recipe.  Otherwise use store-bought pita bread.
     6.  Assembly: When everything is ready, spread some gravy on each plate.  On top of that, place a dollop of sour cream.  On top of that place a slice of ham.  Pour tomato sauce on top.  Serve rice and pita bread on the side of the plates.

Tommy The Warthog And Cookie The Pig

     Tommy the warthog arrived for dinner at the home of Cookie the pig, all wet from the rain.   Cookie the pig fed him mush for dinner with sauces of various kinds.  Tommy the warthog was taken aback but said nothing unkind.  He was not used to this kind of dinner but helped himself to afters of it, with a slice of cheese from the fridge to help it go down.
      They produced a board game from the shelves of Cookie's home to play after dinner, one they both enjoyed.  Cookie suddenly quipped,
     "May I offer you a drink of herb tea, Tommy?"
     "No," Tommy felt like saying because he had already drunk so much water that day, but he was polite so he said yes.
     Then it got worse.
     "I would advise you to have the camomile," Cookie said.  "You could have the marigold blossoms, but they were rancid one time when I tried them."
      "I'll go for the camomile," said Tommy.
     The dinner conversation went on to discuss art, and then it was time to go.  It was all too much for Tommy, you think, but no, he'd been through this many times before, and he was used to it to some extent.
      "No wonder Cookie doesn't have many friends," he said.  "But I liked the painting on her wall.  Perhaps I'll buy it.  I wonder what it costs?  It looks like a five-year-old painted it, but we're good friends and that'll seal the friendship."
     Tommy came back with the money and Cookie didn't die of starvation from not having enough money, so some good came of that day, children.
The End

My own story

The Lorax says:
"Write your own story.
Don't write one about us.
Then everyone will be pleased
And there won't be any fuss."

There was a little boy
Who, every day,
Read his scriptures
And looked at the pictures
And prayed with Mama and Pa
And played his guitar
And went off to school
And acted cool
Refusing coffee and tea
Just like me
So he could a Mormon be.
There, that's my story!

Journal

     Yesterday I wrote my novel at an early hour.  I did dishes and laundry and played my guitar and piano.  I went shopping and attended Family Home Evening.  First we played darts before it started.  We had a lesson on choosing appropriate media from the booklet For The Strength Of Youth, where we recited the 13th Article of Faith and discussed how to choose a good movie.  We wanted to watch Miss Potter but that wasn't available, so we chose The Lorax.  It was good.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Journal

     Saturday was a busy day.  In the morning, my boys went out to learn about soil whilst I made Lazy Man's Cabbage Rolls.  A friend picked me up and ferried me in her car to the Stake Centre to clean it, but when we reached it the cleaning had already been done.  On to the next appointment.  I made hot dogs with Somerset my son, who learned how to boil hot dogs, then I took manuscripts to the post office to mail.  I did one other errand then met, or rather tried to meet with a friend but they had cancelled.  I bought envelopes and paper clips.  We ate supper and I attended a baptism which I enjoyed.  After that we attended a Miracles Fireside which was also enjoyable and I served ice cream sandwiches afterwards.

     To update you on my blog, I have added new parts to the stories of Tatlow The Sailor, Canine Friendly, and The Society Of Harpsichord Builders.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

I Had Fun Dancing To The Fun Dance Rhythms

     Once upon a time, when I was a little girl in England, my parents took me up to town to Foyles' six storey high bookstore.  It was so fun.  The cashier on each floor was in a cage to protect her.  I went straight to the dance section and picked out a book from Brigham Young University called Fun Dance Rhythms. (This is a Mormon university, but I wasn't a Mormon at the time.) It contained instructions for many dances.  I was so excited.  I used it for homeschooling my children when I was a grown up.  I remember doing the Mambo with them, which they thought was hilarious!
      Another time, I went to the same bookstore, also as a little one and bought another dance book entitled
Jazz Dance which had a history of jazz dance (which I read) and instructions in Labannotation (which I still can't read) for many dances.
      I have had so much fun with dance and I hope you do too!

Journal

     I packed it in yesterday with writing a children's story manuscript to mail to a publisher.  (By that I mean I burned the candle at both ends, writing!)

Friday, January 25, 2013

Wasp, The Horse

     Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Joanne.  Now this Joanne is me, but I'm telling this from another person's point of view, so here goes.  Joanne had a horse, you think, but no, that hadn't come yet, but one day she will, because she'll want a horse in Heaven.  Other than that, she didn't have one.  She did however ride another horse and his name was Squirrel.  Now we have heard about this horse already on this website, but there was another horse one day and his name we shall say was Wasp, because that's what he was like, children.  Not that that was his name.  His name didn't suit him.  His name wasn't Frederick, but it was something like that.  Something nice.  But he wasn't a nice horse.  He was a rowdy, dowdy horse.  He was a hooter in Mormon terms.  (That's what they call not very nice people.)

     One day he ran away with Joanne on his back.  Joanne was only seven.  She didn't know how to ride hardly.  And it was Cornflake...Now was it Cornflake?  I can't remember who rode after Wasp and Joanne and stopped Wasp on another fast horse, but somebody kindly did and Joanne is still here today:D  And that is your story for today.

The End

I'm Like Percy Grainger

     I'm like Percy Grainger, the composer.  He ran between concerts.   I walk between manuscripts!

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Miss You!

Dearest Children of my own,

     I hope you have a nice day today.  I won't see you till the weekend and I will miss you for sure!                    

     Yesterday I sallied forth in the pouring rain to mail a manuscript to a publisher.  I hope everything goes well.  We shall see.  How is your week going?  I love you.  Say hi to your Dad.

     Lots of love, see you soon, Mummyxxxxxooooooooxxxxxoo
  

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

My Story: Crying

     I cried for a year when I was 22, because nobody married me.

Story-time Again : Esay

      Well, I guess that's it for the Poetry Festival.
    
     Once upon a time there was a man who lived in the jungle of Buenos Aires.  Where Buenos Aires is, I don't know you think, but no, I've looked at a map and there must be a jungle at Buenos Aires somewhere, so this is about that jungle.
     The man's name was Esay.   He had shoes from Buenos Aires, so they were comfortable.  He lived in a hut, but had shoes fit for a king.
     He climbed up a tree and picked a pomegranate.  Do pomegranates grow on trees?  I have no idea, but I'm writing a story here, so bear with me.  I have always wanted to go to Buenos Aires, so this is my chance to go, in imagination to that wonderful spot.  He picked a pomegranate and it flew open and a bird flew out.  It said, "Why, it's Thursday of course."
     This all struck him as wonderful, as everything in Buenos Aires does.  The food is wonderful, the people are wonderful and the hilltops are wonderful.  Now if I find out Buenos Aires is flat, I'll really be up a creek.
     He taught the bird to speak English and that was his day, teaching the bird.  Goodbye, little children.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Royalty In The Horse Arena

      Once there was a horse named Amber.  Amber was a tip-top horse.  She did as she was told and was kind and gentle.
     Now, about the time this story started, a boy named Rossiter came along and rode Amber around the ring in the horse arena.  A horse arena is for showing off horses.  She was bright.  She was witty.  He was kind so she showed it all off and won an award.
      Can you do that, children?  Can you be kind to horses and other animals, and people too, so they do their best for you?  I can and I think you can, too!

Mountains Move When You Pray

Mountains move when you pray,
So say a prayer every day,
At the start and end of the day
And in between.
Then you'll never run aground
Is the truth,
And you'll be on the right road
All your life.
And if you ever should wander
Then you can always
Get back there
If you pray
If you pray
If you pray.
(And follow the instructions you get if you pray!)

I'm So Angry I Could Scream!

I'm so angry I could scream!
I'm so angry I could scream!
I'm so angry I could scream!
But I won't.

I won't tell you why
So don't ask.
I won't tell you why
So don't ask
But I'll scream
If you ask
So don't!

Kindness Is Most Becoming

As the years go by
Beauty fades often times
But kindness lives on
A wise adornment
To the soul.

Monday, January 21, 2013

Tuck In Your Seat Belts, Children

When you come to a new day
Everyday be sure and pray
That the Lord will grant to you
Safety and a good day too.

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Work

If you put a lot of work
In preparation for a meal,
You may find
That they are pleased
With what you serve~
Do not stint
On baking cookies
For dessert,
Of course, you know.
Then with happiness
You'll glow
And you deserve to.~

Friday, January 18, 2013

2013 Black Beret Poetry Festival / Boing

"Boing" is a word 
I don't seem to use a lot.
I don't know why
I don't seem to do it.
But now I've got used to it,
I think I'll be using it.
Boing to you too,
My dear.

What I Do To Make Money

     Not much, you think, that's why I don't make any, it seems.  But God gave me a way to earn money, it just isn't very much.  Last year's tax return findings will reveal to the onlooker nothing, you think, but no they will show earnings from upholstery-making, fabric cutting, seat cover renting, packing and cleaning, and Christmas tree decorating.  There, now isn't that a fun life?  If only there were more of it.